Hello my friends. Today we are going to talk about living in the past and how that might actually benefit your business more than living and striving for the future. Listen to find out what I mean. This is episode number 55. I’m your host, Becca Pike, and it is time for your weekly dose of Hell Yes Coaching. Let’s go.
Hey, guys. I’m Becca Pike and welcome to The Hell Yes Entrepreneur podcast, the number one show for entrepreneurs looking to create their first six-figure year. If you’ve got the drive and you know how to hustle but you’re not sure where to channel your energy, we’ve got the answers. Let’s dive into today’s show.
Hello you beautiful entrepreneurs. Welcome. Today is a weird day for me. We just had our going away party/breakfast for our very beloved nanny, but I don’t even want to call her a nanny. That’s not quite the right title. She’s literally like a family member. She’s been with us for years. Her husband just got a job in Illinois, an opportunity that they can’t pass up. So she’s moving away. She began working with our family when Cedar was just an infant. So she’s been around for a little while.
She’s the type of worker. You know these people, like the people that haven’t missed a day of work in literally years. She doesn’t call out. She shows up on time every single day. She never complains, and she just works her ass off. But she’s more than a nanny. Like not only has she, like she’s definitely helped us raise our children. She has taken care of our home. She has that like just that feeling of like soft and love. Like she’s stern with our children, but she also like, there’s no question in my mind that she doesn’t just like deeply love them.
She’s been with us and helped us raise our kids, but she’s also like taken care of our home. Actually homes, plural, because she was with us back when all six of us were shoved in that 1,100 square foot house before this one. She has helped us with driving and carpool and pets and laundry and cooking and cleaning.
Even though she’s a massive help in our life and with our home, what I’m gonna miss the most is not her work. It’s just having her around. Her lack of presence is going to feel like such a hole in this house. I’m going to miss our daily texts, our daily photo sharing, making really inappropriate dick jokes all the time, and our kitchen conversations.
For years I’ve had this woman living in my house with me basically right. When I want to like go upstairs out of my office to brew a cup of coffee, she’s there. I get to just chat with another woman, right? Sometimes I refer to her as my wife because that’s what it feels like. Not in like a making out kind of way, but like in a bonded friendship living with your partner in crime kind of way, right? I’m gonna miss that.
I don’t even remember a time when she wasn’t here. It feels like she’s been here forever, our whole life. It feels like a really big chapter of our life is closing right. Like we are moving forward without a nanny here pretty soon. That feels super weird. Time feels weird. It’s always big chapter closings like this that make me introspective on life. And edibles, those do it too.
But like life goes by fast you guys. I swear I was just a 16 year old getting her license and running around my small town like the wild teenager that I was. Then like I just woke up one day and I was 23 traveling the globe. Then like I took a little nap, and I woke up again, and I was pregnant with our third child waddling around trying to build a massage business.
Then I took a nap and woke up again, and our four kids are old enough to not need a nanny anymore because our youngest is going to full time school in the fall. The house is going to go from loud and wild at all hours to very, very, very quiet in the daytime. Something I know that I’ve wished for many times under my breath. But now that it’s happening, I don’t like it. I think that my bittersweet feelings are torn, right? They’re torn between I’m losing a friend, losing a mother like figure for my children.
Like she is gonna go on and have the best life. Like I’m so excited for her in Illinois, and I know that they have a great job opportunity up there. I know that she’s gonna go on. She’s gonna be a little bit closer to her family. So I’m really happy for her, but I know that my children…Like I feel like I’m losing a friend. My children feel like they’re kind of losing this like mother like figure.
But then also combined with the realization too like this has been a big slap in the face that my children are getting so much older so fast. I know that you parents out there get this. So if you need me, I’ll be crying into my children’s little sweet flower smelling hair until they push me away aggressively and tell me to stop embarrassing them. Ah. Okay, I suppose we shall get to the show now.
I have a message that I think everyone needs to hear on repeat forever. No matter which business you’re in, what industry, no matter what level of success you’re at, this reminder is so needed. But before we do, I just want to give a shout out to a new Three More member, Hilary Talbott. She just recently joined Three More.
She owns an acupuncture clinic alongside of her co-owner, and this is what she just posted in the Three More private community. She said, “#When I joined Three More a week ago. Since then, I have revived my podcast that was in hibernation for a year. I’ve written and scheduled four emails that I feel so great about because I’m using the formula of the challenge philosophy value that Becca teaches. All with a PS call to action that relates to the body of the email.
“I appeared and added value on a panel. I posted on social media a post that made me want to simultaneously throw up and giggle because I unapologetically showed up as me, and it was crazy to watch my nervous system flip out and just keep deciding to do it anyway. This shit works in the best way.”
I love this. I absolutely love this Hillary. Congrats to you. The results that you are seeing in Three More are so powerful. Huge thank you to you, huge thank you to the entire community. If you’re looking to gain momentum in your business, build your paying client list, and make more money, you want to be in Three More. Come in and see what all the fuss is about. See what I’m talking about all this time.
What if you stopped waiting? What if you stopped saying that you’re going to join when…? Do you want to make money now or do you want to make money later? Come in.
Okay, time for Becca’s weekly lesson. This is going to be pretty short and simple guys. You ready. So this is what I want to talk about. It’s really easy for people to look at all their problems, all their frustrations, all the agony of business building every day. We have to, right? Like it’s in our face. When we have a problem, it requires our attention to solve for it as the owner of the business.
So most of us walk around on the daily thinking about how our email open rate wasn’t very high or our social media posts didn’t get much engagement or how our employee didn’t respond very well when that customer was frustrated or whatever it is that’s bothering you. Problems can feel more in our face, more surface level, and easier to focus on. Our brains are wired to look for problems, right? This is why. It’s part of our species. It’s how we’ve survived for so long.
Versus when we have a celebration. It doesn’t feel as important or urgent to notice, right? A lot of us choose voluntarily to try to notice these celebrations, fuel them, and give them life, right. Some of us don’t. Some of us watch our achievements float by like a lonely lost sailboat in the middle of the night because we’re so focused on what’s going wrong.
Have you guys ever been in a situation where you’re feeling really down in the dumps about your business? You’re like being all dramatic about it, right? Only to realize like wait a second, actually you’re inside the most successful quarter or year your business has ever seen. Has this ever happened to you? Right? It has happened to me. It’s happened to my clients. We have to set consistent reminders to ourselves on how far we have come and where we came from. We absolutely cannot enjoy our achievements if we are only focused on what we haven’t achieved.
What if you stopped saying I didn’t get any clients at that networking event, and you started saying wow, I went to my first networking event. Like how courageous of me? What if you stopped saying I only made $500 this month, and you started saying wow, I made $500 this month. Like my highest revenue last year was $500, and now it’s like considered a low revenue month. Like I’ve come so far. Right?
What have you stopped saying none of my interview candidates are working out, and started saying wow, I’ve never held this many interviews before. I’m getting so good at hosting interviews. I’m like learning what I like and what I don’t like in my interview process, right? Sometimes when your interview process isn’t going really well, like you aren’t hiring people, it’s because you’ve gotten better at knowing exactly what you don’t want, right?
You guys success takes failure, and it takes time. It takes repeated effort. It takes compounding. It takes seeing the good when all our brain wants to do is see the shitty. One of my favorite things to live by is the following quote, but before I read this quote, I was practicing it often right. So when I did come across it, it like touched me. It’s in the book The Gap and The Gain by Dan Sullivan, highly recommend that book. He said, “The way to measure your progress is backward against where you’ve started, not against your ideal.” Right?
So like a lot of us stare at our ideal place that we want to be, revenue we want to make, amount of clients we want to have, and we just stare it in the face, and we think about how far we have to go to get there. Instead of looking backward and realizing how far we’ve come, right? It seems pretty simple. It’s not terribly profound by any means, but it is so important.
So I wrote this following post. I’m gonna read a post to you. I wrote it inside the Three More community the other day, and I’m gonna read it to you. Okay. This is what I said. I said, “Just a reminder, I had zero people show up to my first webinar. I had zero people ask me for my business card at my first networking event. I had people ask for massage appointments, I gave them a discount, and they still no showed.
“I have had cringe worthy Facebook Lives. I have had mass exodus of subscribers on my mailing list. I have hired employees that were terrible fits because I didn’t screen properly. I have not had the courage to say the hard things. I have bombed consults. I have failed. I have looked dumb. I have sat in the sucky.
“The only reason that I am a self-made millionaire is because of these exact things. Every single fail forced me to problem solve, forced me to try something different, forced me to learn more, forced me to dust off my knees and try again. The compounding effect is powerful guys. Keep getting up.”
So that’s what I wrote inside of Three More. When I wrote this, I was remembering back to all of the feelings and emotions that I had when these things happened, right. I was so focused on the failures that it was hard for me to see how quickly I was progressing. Whereas my friend calls it failing forward.
If you could see me back then on the exact day that that networking event was a flop or the exact day that so many people unsubscribed from my emailing list, you wouldn’t have seen a happier thankful girl. I was pissed, right? Felt like nothing was working. I still have days like this sometimes, but it’s my job now to bring my attention broader. I take it very seriously. I think about it often and broadening out into the bigger picture.
If I just assess one day at a time. I’m going to have days that feel awful, right? Like if I just think I need to make money every single day, and there’s going to be days that I make zero. That’s gonna feel awful, right? Imagine if you decided you wanted to make money every day. How is that different than saying that you need to make money every hour? How is that different than saying that you need to make money every second?
No, it’s feels so much better to broaden your horizons and say okay, how much money did I make this quarter or this year? Because that, my friends, is when you begin to give yourself a more fair assessment, right?
I could sit in the sucky, or I could say holy shit. Only one million women have women owned businesses that bring in seven figure revenues. Of that stat, only 15% of them are self-made. What? Or I could say holy crap just a few years ago at this exact time of day, right. Like it is 3:00 p.m. right now. At this exact time of day, I would be strapping on my shoes, tying my apron behind my back to go into Big Blue Martini, the cocktail bar that I worked endless hours at.
At this exact time only like seven-ish years ago, I will be putting band aids on my toes because I knew that ahead of me was a 13 hour shift of me pacing through the restaurant’s kitchen, grabbing hot plates, stacking them on trays, lifting that heavy shit over my shoulder, and walking to tables with a smile plastered on my face even though I’m starving. I haven’t sat down in like 11 hours. All the men keep telling me to smile. I’m going to lose my shit, right? But that was only a few years ago. What if I looked at it that way?
Or I could focus on the fact that my big, massive over the moon goal only a few years ago for Massage Strong was to see 70 people in a week. I couldn’t fathom how that could even happen. My brain couldn’t comprehend what that would look like, how I would get that many people in the doors, like where they would go to get their massages, who would see them. I couldn’t understand exactly how it was going to happen, but I kept telling myself that it was possible. 70 people in a week.
Today Massage Strong, on average, sees about 150 appointments per week. Or I could say holy crap just last year, I had never run an online community before. Now I have a successful Three More, 30 More, pop-up webinar communities. I host a damn podcast that has tens of thousands of downloads. What? I can say wow, right? Like I’m quickly learning how to host communities.
So my message to you today is to be fair to yourself. If you’re going to think of all of the shit then you have to also think of all the good stuff too. It’s not fair to only shine light on half of your results. You’ve got to shine light on the whole freaking thing. The good, the bad, the amazing, the weird, all of it.
Just remember you can do this with anything. You can look at your spouse and be like wow, we fight all the time. Or you can look at them and be like wow, we resolve our fights all the time. Because we are committed and we’re not going anywhere. Right?
You can look at your performance at the gym and think I’ll never be able to lift 300 pounds on the deadlift. Or you can look at it like wow, I’ve never held on to a goal for this long. Like I’ve been trying to hit 300 pounds for a year, right? It takes courage, self-responsibility, and drive to keep trying for the exact same goal after that many fails. That, my friend, is a super win.
That is it for me today you all. Please join me inside Three More. Can’t wait to see you guys in there. You can find more information on www.threemoreclients.com. You can also stay tuned for the next couple of minutes and listen as I explain exactly what you get inside of Three More right here on the podcast. All right guys. Have a great day, and I will see you here next week. Bye.
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Hey, thanks for taking the time to listen to today’s episode. If you’re looking to get more clarity and momentum for your business, visit hellyescoachingonline.com. See you next week here on The Hell Yes Entrepreneur podcast.