Ep #11: Your Identity and Why it Matters | The Hell Yes Entrepreneur Podcast

The Hell Yes Entrepreneur Podcast with Becca Pike | Your Identity and Why it Matters Your identity is your choice, and every label that you give yourself has the ability to empower or disempower you. But some people never stop and reassess the labels they were given years ago. For example, maybe your parents told you that you’re shy, and ever since you were a kid you’ve thought of yourself that way and it’s affected how you show up.

Labels show up constantly when I’m coaching my clients because they have been sold false truths their entire lives. In this episode, I’m showing you how to see the false truths you’ve been sold and showing you how you can choose your identity, step into embodying it, and start using it to grow personally and professionally.

Tune in this week to discover the labels that are currently contributing to your identity and how they might be stopping you and your business from growing. I’m sharing how I help my clients see this for themselves, and what you can do to choose an identity that empowers you instead of keeping you stuck.

If you enjoyed today’s show, I would really appreciate it if you would leave a rating and review to let me know and help others find The Hell Yes Entrepreneur Podcast. Click here for step-by-step instructions on how to follow, rate, and review!

What You’ll Learn from this Episode:

  • Why the labels we are given in childhood stick with us for years.
  • How your current thoughts about your identity could be creating negative results in your business.
  • Where I see my clients using labels like “beginner” against themselves.
  • Why maintaining growth is impossible unless you choose to step into and recognize a new identity.
  • How to start choosing new and empowering labels, no matter where you are right now as an entrepreneur.

Listen to the Full Episode:

Featured on the Show:

  • If you enjoyed today’s show, I would really appreciate it if you would leave a rating and review to let me know and help others find The Hell Yes Entrepreneur Podcast. Click here for step-by-step instructions on how to follow, rate, and review!
  • Wild Health
  • Brittany McKnight
  • Brooke Castillo

Full Episode Transcript:

Download Transcript 1

Hey guys. Welcome to episode 11 of The Hell Yes Entrepreneur. This is your host Becca Pike. And today we’re going to be talking about the identity and the labels that you give yourself and the effect that it has on your business and your mind. Let’s go.

Hey, guys. I’m Becca Pike and welcome to The Hell Yes Entrepreneur podcast, the number one show for entrepreneurs looking to create their first six-figure year. If you’ve got the drive and you know how to hustle but you’re not sure where to channel your energy, we’ve got the answers. Let’s dive into today’s show.

What’s up my people? How are we doing today? You all, I want to be real with you guys. I want you to know that I’m showing you my true self. So that’s why today I’m going to tell you a story about poop. Are you ready? Before I even start, can I just say all you parents out there. Did you ever think you were going to talk about poop this much? You know, I had a dog before I had kids. Thought I talked about poop then. Like at the vet clinic, always making sure that her poop was healthy. Now that I have kids it’s on a whole other level.

So anyways, here’s what’s going down. I hope that you find this story as wildly entertaining and laughable as I do. So I have some of the most world-renowned functional medicine doctors at my fingertips. I’m a very lucky woman. My friend Dr. Matt Dawson owns Wild Health. You may have heard of his podcast and his team as he is making a huge splash in the individualized medicine world. He and his team rely heavily on genomics and DNA to make my health journey extremely personalized. I cannot recommend them highly enough.

So long story short, I’ve been having some symptoms that I’ve been talking with him and my assigned Wild Health coaches Trey about. So we’ve discussed different options for me. We’ve discussed sending in a microbiome test. If you know me at all, you know I’m obsessed with learning about my microbiome.

There’s these at home kits where you can send in samples of your poop to a designated lab, and they will send you basically everything you need to know about the richness and the diversity and what’s lacking from the organisms that are living in your body.  It’s like my dream come true. I have been nerding out on microbiome health for years now. So I said hell yes. Let’s do it.

So after I had agreed to do this test, and I’m thinking that this test is being sent to my house already. So after that my coach is like, “Hey listen. We now have some new information, and we have a few reasons to believe that you should be tested for SIBO.” So if you don’t know what this is, it’s small intestinal bacterial overgrowth. It’s kind of a big deal. Kind of serious. If this test does come back positive, then it would really point to the answers of a lot of the symptoms that I’m having.

So as crazy as it sounds, I’m like team SIBO. I’m like yes. It would make so much sense that I have SIBO. I hope that that’s it. Because then there’s going to be a really clear answer. Send the test. I will take it. I can’t wait.

So I receive the SIBO test, and it’s like a series of bags. Not just one. I’m like hmm, this seems like a lot of poop to send in the mail. It came with instructions of like what to eat the day before for the best results and so that the lab could have the most clear results and all of that. So I just wasn’t feeling super sure. I was like gosh, you know, something Is telling me that I should just like touch base with Trey, my health coach.

So I contact my health coach, and I’m like, “Hey just to be super clear, I’m going to poop and send it in the mail, right?” He says, “Oh my god no. This is a SIBO test. This is a breath test. You need to breathe into the bags and send them to the lab. Do not poop in the breath bags Becca.”

Oh my god guys. I have been laughing for days at this interaction. What if I sent my poop to a breath company? How would I have ever lived that down? If it actually went through, I would not be telling you guys on the podcast. What would they have thought if they opened up my breath bags and it was poop? I can’t. Like I have been dying. I had to share. I asked my best friend Kate if I should share the story with the podcast listeners. Through her laughing tears she said, “It would not be true Becca Pike fashion if you did not.”

So lesson before the lesson. Always double check the expected strategy when assuming that you’re sending your poop through the mail. Okay guys? I’ll keep you updated on the results. If you’re interested in these tests for yourself or you’re looking for a fantastic doctor, definitely hit up Wild Health. They do a lot of their work online, and they can see anyone in any state.

Always remember guys that there are so many options in a world where medicine feels so westernized and just driven by money and pharmaceuticals. There are people that will help you from a different, more progressive and individualized angle. So always know your options.

So today we’re going to do a sexy celebration. This is from the Hell Yes: The Entrepreneur Circle. This is my free Facebook group. This is from one of my client’s Brittany McKnight. Brittany McKnight is a kick ass money coach. When she came to me, she was an accountant. She was working her nine to five jobs, but she had dreams of working for herself. She jumped into my group the Three More class where we teach sales. Within being in that group for two weeks, she was already in the Zero to Coach program where we teach people how to become certified coaches.

So this is what she said. It’s kind of lengthy, so I’m going to quote it out for you. So starting quotes. “I am 85% to my client/revenue goal for June as of yesterday where I received $5,900 in one day. I am pretty sure that is the most I’ve ever been paid in a single day, but honestly at this point I believe that I am worth 10 times more. When I first started coaching four months ago, I grossly undercharged my clients because I just wasn’t experienced enough.

“Since then I’ve gotten a multitude of experience. I’ve been in two business coaching groups, one of them is Hell Yes’s Three More, and I’ve had two one-on-one coaches, and I started Becca’s mastermind Thirty More. I have read incessantly, and I try to share as much as possible with anyone and everyone that I can to help them enhance the quality of their life.

“Fast forward I made a goal at mid-May that I would make my $12,000 investment back before Becca’s mastermind begins. As of this morning, I’m only $1,300 away from that goal. Next month my goal is to launch a course and obtain one coaching client for a minimum of $14,000. My first planned five figure month on my own. I made my goals non-negotiable, and I rooted out anything that got in the way of that. It is so crazy and not crazy how my mind made this shit happen. I was never really worried about it, but I didn’t always know how it would play out. I just trusted myself above all else.

“When I got paid yesterday, I didn’t even get excited or emotionally charged from seeing all of that coming in because I had finally just expected it. Now I expect a lot more. I fucking love what I do and the opportunity I have to actually help people transform their lives to be exponentially greater than what they have ever expected and talk about money while doing it. Anyways my point is that I wanted to offer much gratitude to Becca Pike.” Thank you, Brittany.

“I certainly owe a lot of gratitude to all my coaches. To each their own, but I am so damn ecstatic to be coached by this woman. I also owe a shit ton of gratitude to a few other folks that I plan to reach out to individually. After talking to my husband last night, I think he now believes in me after he has seen all of this happen. I believed it before I even saw it, and that has been so powerful. We haven’t even started yet, and I have already gotten so much out of Thirty More. I cannot even fathom how awesome this is going to be after we get started.”

What a win. So awesome Brittany. You are kicking ass, and you are a huge part of the history of Three More as well as the future of Thirty More. We loved watching you go through the Zero to Coach program, and you are just kicking ass in so many ways. You are the epitome of grit and tenacity, and you’re just showing up every single day. That is why you are getting what you came for. So fun to watch.

All right guys. So let’s get to the nitty gritty. Your identity is your choice. Your labels, they’re your choice. Every label that you give yourself is either empowering or it’s unempowering. I just want you to know that you’re doing it to yourself. If you are feeling unempowered or if you’re feeling empowered, it is often just a label or a title or a thought that you have produced onto yourself.

So some people never look at the labels that they were given and stop to reassess them. Your parents may have told you every day that you’re shy. Maybe you believed them. It has affected the way you show up in social settings, right?

So labels show up constantly when I’m coaching my clients. A lot of my clients don’t even realize that their label is a label because they believe them so heartedly and they take it so much as truth. Sometimes we don’t see opinions because they’re so deeply ingrained in us as false truths. Our parents gave us labels, our teachers gave us labels. If we were kids when we received these labels, then we are much more likely to see them as truths or just fully digest them as our own than if we received these labels as adults.

Our thoughts, guys, our thoughts about ourselves, our thoughts about the world, our thoughts about other people. Our thoughts give us certain feelings. These feelings create our actions. These actions create our results. This is the model 101. This is Brooke Castillo The Life Coach School teachings, right. So if you’ve been through any of those schoolings or if you listen to Brooke Castillo, you are probably pretty well equipped on the model.

For those of you that aren’t, I’m just going to give you a quick overview.  The thoughts that you have about yourself, they create feelings. Those feelings create the actions that you take, and those actions are what create your results. So let’s go through some examples.

I have a lot of people that no matter how long they’ve been in business, they still label themselves as a beginner. For a lot of them, they use this as a copout. Now, they don’t know that they’re doing it. Their intention isn’t to cop out. They are very hard workers. They’re trying really hard, but they continue to say to themselves, “Well, I’m new at this.” It gives them a soft place to land when they don’t want to progress further or when they don’t want to spend their energy learning a new thing, or when they don’t want to go any further out of their comfort zone than they already are, right?

So I was just hanging out with one of my clients. She has been owning a Botox bar for about a year and a half. She said to me the other day, she was like, “I really want to do this, but you know I’m still a newbie. I’m still a beginner.” I said, “Stop right there. You’re not a newbie. You’re not a beginner. If you keep telling yourself that, then you’re going to always have that excuse. That soft place to land. At what point are you not a newbie or beginner, right? When do you decide that that’s over?”

I went ahead and just made sure that that was over at that point. I was like listen. We can’t call you a newbie anymore. That time is done. I also had another girl; she owns an IV bar. Her name’s Melissa. She lives in Iowa. She actually is new, okay. But I wanted to nip this in the bud before she could let it take her down. So she’s only been open with her IV bar for like a month and a half. She said to me today, “I really want to start memberships, but I’m just so new I’m busy doing all this other stuff.”

I said, “Listen. Whether or not you have memberships has nothing to do with whether or not you’re new. You could have opened your business with a membership. You can create memberships in the next 15 minutes. It’s just a couple clicks of a button in your software, and it’s telling your staff that we longer offer a la carte sessions. It is now all memberships. What I want you to see Melissa is that you are copping out of this by saying that you’re new. Now this doesn’t mean that you want to cop out even cognitively. You might not even know that you’re doing this. But it has given you this reason for all the things that you haven’t done.”

So guys, just be very careful with what you’re saying. She understood. She was like, “Yeah, I completely agree. Right. Being new has nothing to do with whether or not I have memberships, right?” Right.

Here’s another label that I hear often. People will say all the time, “I’m not very good at sales.” Well guys listen. Let’s say that your thought is that you’re not very good at sales. What kind of feeling does that create? Well, it creates a feeling of inadequacy when it’s time to sell, right?

So what kind of action does inadequacy take? When you are feeling inadequate, do you think you tell a lot? Do you think you’re excited to sell? No, of course not. If you’re feeling inadequate, the action that you’re probably doing to take is inaction. You’re probably not going to sell or spend your time selling because you’re telling yourself that you’re not good at sales. So if your action is inaction, what do you think your results will be? Your results will be not very good sales.

It all stems from the thought of, “I’m not very good at sales.” Right? Versus the person that has killer sales and is having the best day of their life. If you trace back their results back to their actions, back to their feelings, back to their thought, what you’re going to find is that their thought is that they love sales. Or they think sales is fun.

One of my colleagues the other day, Kristen Boss, said, “Sales are the easiest part of my job.” I loved that thought, right? So that person is going to have a feeling of adequacy. “I love sales. I am adequate in sales.” Then what kind of action do you think they’re going to take? They’re going to take the action of going balls to the wall all out on sales. They’re going to try different things. They’re going to be a little bit more courageous because they’re going to have this trust in themselves that they’re really good at sales. What result do you think comes from that, right? Money.

What about this label? “I don’t do debt.” That’s a hardcore label. I don’t do debt shuts your brain down hardcore. That is a smackdown ironclad gate to debt. I don’t do it, right? I won’t do it. What if the possibility arises that you need to have debt? What if you want to have debt? What if your business needs something?

What if your business plant needs soil or water or sunshine, and you don’t have the money to have those things? How are you going to give your plant these things if you don’t do debt? I’m not saying that you have to do debt but saying that you won’t do it really just comes from a label. It shuts down all possibilities of using tools that may be needed in your business.

Here’s another label. “I’m not a people person. I’m not good enough at parties.” It might be a thought. “I’m not good enough with socialization. I’m not good at this.” Then what action do you create if you tell yourself this over and over? Sitting in a corner, not networking properly, not growing your business. Not growing your relationships, your social circle, not making friends. The result will literally be that you’re not surrounded by people.

It’s like a manifesting cycle. Like your result is literally just exactly what you said to yourself. That you’re not surrounded by people. That you’re not a people person. Does this make sense?

What about this one? So I hear this all the time, and it is so ironic to me. “I’m not good at managing people.” Okay? So here’s the irony behind it. The people that say this to me most are usually business owners that want to start hiring staff. They want to have staff, and they’ve never had staff before. They’re the ones that are always like, “I’m not good at managing people.” Like dammit Susan. You’ve never even managed anyone. You don’t have any staff members. Why would you put that label on yourself before you’ve even started?

If you keep repeating that you’re not good at managing people, what feelings come from that? What actions come from that? What result do you think comes from that? Definitely fear of hiring people. Definitely not really knowing how to manage the people because you’re going to continue to tell yourself that you’re just not good at it. We have to watch our labels. We have to watch what we’re saying to ourselves. We have to watch what other people are saying to us, and what we’re allowing into our minds.

Here’s a couple awesome labels, right. So here’s some labels. I just grabbed these out of my own brain. So here’s a few labels that have gotten me through some tough times. So I’ve labeled myself as a quick learner. Because I feel like I’m a quick learner and because my dad told me this 1,000 times and because I’ve told myself this 1,000 times then I don’t get overwhelmed when I need to learn something new. Because in my mind I’m like, “Well, it will be quick.” Like I need to learn this new software. I don’t know. I’m a quick learner. I’ll figure it out. There is no anxiety or overwhelm there.

Here’s another one. I think this is my top one. You know I’m courageous. I’m very courageous in my business adventures. I am not courageous in watersports. I do not want to waterski with you on your boat. Stop inviting me. I do not want to jet ski. I do not want watersports. In my business, I am courageous AF. Okay?

I am really good at taking risks that are calculated that I know have a great chance at a positive outcome for me. A lot of people are debilitated by fear when it comes to taking risks in their business, right? One of the thoughts that I have that goes with this is this is kind of fucked up, but I’m really good at being broke.

So if I take a calculated risk that doesn’t end in my favor and it is problematic and I lose all my money, well shit. Nobody’s better than me at being broke as shit. I am the queen of knowing how to hustle to get money back. I am the queen of knowing how to do food stamps. I know how to clip coupons. I know how to make a dollar stretch. This probably isn’t even a good label at all now that I’m saying it out loud, but it helps me with being a risk taker. I’m like, “Well if anybody can be broke, it’s me. I know how to do that.”

Another thought that goes with being courageous is that I can always make my wealth back. If I were to do something courageous and lose all of my wealth, the one thing that no one can take from me is my knowledge. Once you guys learn how to make money, no one can take that away from you. No one is able to get into your head and take that. I mean like aside from brain trauma or a disease that makes you forget everything.

Once you learn how to make money, you will always have that. If you ever go bankrupt, you can always trust yourself that you can create it again. This is why we watch people go bankrupt six/seven times and create millions of dollars over and over and over again.

Another thought that I tell myself that is empowering, another label, is like I am really good at being out of my comfort zone. So I have always thrived at being out of my comfort zone. Even looking back on my life. Like when things start feeling boring, I would always shake things up by trying to enter a bodybuilding competition or a CrossFit competition or whatever it was that I was doing. I was always searching for this out of my comfort zone place. I have found it in everything that I have done. It’s always there if you’re looking for it.

If I were afraid or if I told myself that I was afraid to be out of my comfort zone, then I would have a really hard time growing my business or reaching my goals or making friends or doing anything that I think life is all about, right?

So all of these are labels that I gave myself, all of these positive ones. Of course I have negative ones that I have been continually working through my entire adult life, right? I want you to ask yourself what would happen if you gave yourself only empowering labels?  Like what if you removed all of your labels that weren’t empowering? What the hell would happen to your life?

I want you to make a list of how you or other people around you would describe you. Then I want you to write next to them where they came from. Like oh, I think maybe my mom gave me this label. Or I think I gave me this label. Or you know what? My basketball coach from high school gave me this label. I remember the day that it happened.

Then on a one to ten scale, I want you to choose right now in your adult life how true they are. Maybe you have never reassessed these labels to decide how true these are. Guys just a sidebar. Please be careful with the labels that you put on your kids. “He never finishes his vegetables. She’s really shy. She’s a girly girl. She’s a tomboy. He’s always argumentative. He’s always fighting with his siblings.” These are the things that stick with our kids guys.

Even when my kids are having a hard time socially, I always try to tell them empowering labels that will make their life easier. I have a daughter who is now six. When she was about three or four, she was debilitated by social anxiety. I was honestly worried about her future, like for real. It got to the point where it wasn’t just like a phase anymore. My husband and I were diligent about not letting her hear us discuss the situation so that she wouldn’t grab onto any labels.

All she heard from us was how much of a leader she was, and how she was so good at making friends. How everyone wanted to be near her. Y’all after a year or two, she started believing it. I watched the evolution happen in her little mind. I watched as she would repeat some of the strong empowering labels that we gave her. She would say it to herself. It was the cutest thing.

If it makes sense to you to not label your kids, make sure that you’re understanding the importance of it not happening for yourself. You do what your brain believes is best. If you tell yourself that you’re not good at sales then why would you ever attempt to be the best at sales? It would feel like a lost cause, right?

Here’s also another example that makes so much sense to me, not business related. Imagine that you want to lose weight. If you say, “I can’t lose weight,” then the hidden meaning behind this is almost like your body is broken. Like if you can’t lose weight, then that kind of means like my body isn’t doing what it’s supposed to be doing, right?

Like maybe in the back of your mind you think that you have a thyroid problem, or you think it’s a hormonal thing or something is just off about your body. Because your husband can stop drinking soda and lose 32 pounds in like the first three hours. I know how that goes.

If you start thinking, and I’m talking like undiagnosed thyroid problem. Like no one has actually ever told you this. You’re just allowing your imagination run wild with all of the problems that your body might have. If you tell yourself these things, then you’re going to assume that your body is broken. So why would you even try if you believed that your body was broken? I can’t lose weight equals brokenness. If your body is broken, why fix it? How would you have the tools to fix it? It is what it is, right? You wouldn’t try as hard to lose the weight.

I tell myself often that my body is super strong, and that I was gifted with amazing genes. If you look at my lineage, you know that that is some bullshit. Diseases everywhere in my family there. By believing that my body is really strong, I actually treat it differently and better than if I believe that my body is broken, right?

Labels are everything guys. Choose your words wisely. Listen, people will label you your whole life. You can always decide what’s allowed into your psyche when other people are labeling you. You choose what goes in and stays just like you get to choose what goes in and falls right back out because it’s garbage, right?

Listen guys. If this is resonating with you and you want to discuss more about how your labels could be hindering your business or your sales, please reach out to us. My class Three More is enrolling right now, and we have a plethora of coaches that are ready to help you blow your goals out of the water. We have everything you need here at Hell Yes Coaching to grow the shit out of your business and your mind, and we can’t wait to start with you on a deep and personal level. So visit us at www.hellyescoachingonline.com for more info.

All right guys. This is it for today’s episode. I will see you right here next week for another kick ass episode of The Hell Yes Entrepreneur. Have a great day. Bye.

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Hey, thanks for taking the time to listen to today’s episode. If you’re looking to get more clarity and momentum for your business, visit hellyescoachingonline.com. See you next week here on The Hell Yes Entrepreneur podcast.

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